My birthday is coming up

I decided to register for gifts for my birthday. I figure it will make shopping for me easier. I chose two places. The first:

ATM.

The second:

Hammacher Schlemmer.

There are two items I really want.

The complete Swiss Army Knife


This baby goes for a mere $1500. Nice. A bit much for the pocket, but talk about a tool Tim Allen would love.

14 mph Cooler


This thing is a steal at $500. All those walks to . . . where ever . . . hauling your cooler? This is perfect for me and my back problems. Plus, I'd be the first one there. I could help reserve a spot! There's also a seat that fits to the top.

So, there ya go. You've got a month yet. So, take a collection, pool the money, and order away. Believe it or not, HS is sold out of the Swiss Army WMD! So, order now!

And there's always ATM.